"It's very hard to understand that the whole idea is not to beat the other runners. Eventually you learn that the real competition is against the voice inside you that wants to quit." -George Sheehan.
This hit home for me. I'm competitive by nature but I'm far from the fastest of the bunch. There are times when I'll be running and see people pass me and wonder what the heck, why are they passing me? What am I doing wrong that makes me not as fast as them. I wonder if I stop and walk could I make up some excuse as to why I didn't finish in the top of the pack. But I always keep going and I really have to push myself. I can drive myself insane.
During the Rock and Roll I had to repeat to myself "Pain is only temporary.." over and over and over again... I knew that once the race was over I would be able to feel my toes again and my shins would recover. But I just had to keep going. Had To.
I am hoping this year I am able to enjoy the runs I do. I think I was just doing them last year. Always worrying about "how well" I'd do and what would people think if I didn't finish with a decent time. When you put that much pressure on yourself it's hard to focus on the other parts of the runs that are suppose to be fun.
The first race of 2010 will be on March 14th. I'll be putting longer runs in earlier this year in hopes that the fear of fizzling out early leaves my mind. I've already spent a couple months in physical therapy so they will continue to help me strengthen those areas that I am weak to prevent the same injuries as before. The less I have on my plate I think it will all fall into place.